As my friends and family know, I have an offbeat sense of humor. I like novelty songs, those intentionally humorous comedic narrations put to music like Ray Stevens' The Streak, or Elmo & Patsy's Christmas classic, Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.
As a result, someone that I may or may not know, gave me a unique present for my 50th birthday two years ago, a recording of an original novelty song that he or she wrote. I recently asked him or her for permission to play the song in my journal. He or she said that if I identified him/her in any way that he/she would kill me. He/She also said that I was not to acknowledge that the composer and singer of the tune is anyone that I know, again under pain of death. As long as I adhered to her/his request, I could use the song.
So, I may or may not know the man or woman who wrote this novelty tune. I will suffer torture rather than reveal her/his identity, because torture is preferable to certain death should I speak the name of this person that I may or may not know. (Note: For those of you who sometimes take me far too seriously, she/he did threaten to kill me but I don't think that he/she meant it.)
To listen to the song, please click here.
The lyrics are posted below. The fun of novelty songs are the lyrics. Of course, I had to listen to the song three times in order to write down the lyrics; there may be errors. I also love the unknown person's deadpan delivery of this tune.
Killer (Down Goes Frazier)
I’m in love with a tall silly girl
She’s every light that shines in my world
But there’s just one thing ‘bout her makes me blue
And if you got a minute
I’ll share it with you
chorus
She’s a boxer
And sometimes she gets mad at me.
I’m as happy as a man can be
To have that girl with me.
But if you said some things can be better,
Well I’d agree,
Like I wish that I could count pass by three.
Repeat chorus
I didn’t want my baby to be bored,
But she found a trainer from the psychiatric ward.
He showed her how to sting like a bee.
She’s landed every punch she’s learned on me.
Repeat chorus
I bought her a wedding band.
She knocked me out later with the same hand.
Her neurologist friend knew what to do,
But for some reason he hit me too.
Think he might be a boxer
I don’t know why he’s mad at me.
No one ever said that love is a thorn less rose
But when I ask my baby to let me get in close
For some reason, she won’t let me in.
I try to kiss her;
She uppercuts my chin.
She’s a boxer
Love’s gonna be the death of me.
If you want to steer clear of total mayhem
Don’t let her catch you under her bed at five AM.
She won’t buy your story about the dog,
And for the next six months you’ll just see a sparkling fog.
She’s a boxer
She’s a boxer
I love her but I forgot her name.
Ah, she’s as pretty as a butterfly
But she hits like Ali
She’s a boxer,
But sometimes she gets mad at me.
8 comments:
I have to be honest. That was an ODD experience. I thought your He/She set up was pretty funny, considering the highly unambiguous voice of the singer, and I thought the lyrics theymselves were quite brilliant. But that the slow mournful tune, particularly not TO any other well known tune (I thought it was going to be the Simon and Garfunkel's "The Boxer" or something), it made be honestly wonder if this was actually the Ballad of Battered Husband, like for real.
Parody songs work because they are in the style of the original, or of other songs of that ilk. ("Help Me Make It Through the Yard" comes to mind). The premise is comic, the lyrics bear it out, but can't vote for the music and dirgelike delivery. Sorry.
Sheria, don't beat him up any more, for crying out loud.
I enjoyed that, very funny, we have'nt sen you in journal chat yet!
Take care
Yasmin
His mournful singing voice is a cross between Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash...(in my ears' opinion), what do you think? If he were to read this, depending upon how he feels about either of those singers, he might feel complemented or insulted. However, I found it very funny... and I like both Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash, so it wasn't meant as an insult. I think the man has talent! bea
Ray Stevens is still around and performing in Branson! Who knew?
;)
Russ
I aint sure who's singing it, but the song's brilliant. I would have gone for Johhny Cash myself!
Gaz ;-)
First of all, Dude sounds like he MEANS it. I did find it funny, but have been taken to task for forwarding an email (nonmusical but of this nature)quite like this. I was told by a male friend I sent my email to: IF THAT WERE A WOMAN YOU WOULD HAVE SAID SHE'D BEEN ABUSED.
Yup, he's right. OMG, I'm not perfect :-0. I still find it funny & done with real talent. ~Mary
Yeah, guess I'd need speakers and HEAR it, where the funny part is and all. My male cousin died of domestic abuse, and I know you'd never condone that. Intentionally humorous comedic narrations are good to have in life. I was thinking that the boxer would end up being a dog, yanno, a boxer.
I was checking out others who tagged an entry with Ray Stephens in technorati and ended up here. Hillarious song! I hope for him it is fiction. ;o) - Barbara
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