Christmas is almost here. I still have sweet potato pies to bake, and a few gifts to wrap, but I'm almost done. Tomorrow, I plan to bake, wrap, and listen to Christmas music. We're having Christmas dinner on Monday at my sister and her husband's home. I'm bringing the pies.
When I was a child, it seemed that there was an eternity from one Christmas to the next; now, I want to slow everything down. Time is passing far too swiftly and I grab onto every precious moment that I can.
I just looked outside at the lights that I strung yesterday and they are all aglow. I feel at peace with myself and I'm happy. I am thankful to be able to say that. Getting here, being happy, has been a long struggle for me. I am still amazed that I can feel contentment and take pleasure in something as simple as Christmas lights.
I know that I'm very fortunate. I've known the darkness of depression, a darkness so black that it swallowed the light. I know that there are millions who are still trapped in that never ending night. I wish that I could say that I know the path out of the dark, but there is no single pathway. The journey is different for each of us. I can only say that it may help to make a daily effort to cherish yourself. No matter how insignificant you feel, you are a person of worth.
I'm no therapist. I don't know any secrets to finding inner joy and peace. I don't feel superior. I am humble because I know that the darkness is always out there and that becoming trapped in it again is possible. I live in the present; I remember the past; I look forward to the surprises of the future. Merry Christmas to all!
O Holy Night by the Temptations
16 comments:
I appreciate your philosophy. There is no single route back to the light. Enjoy the moment right now. The next isn't promised and like you said seems like just a few days ago I was going thru holiday perparations. Hmmm, time is passing by so fast.
A Merry Christmas to you and all.
Spencer
So true, Sheria, so true... I think it's that thinking you expressed here that prevents me from feeling too badly about being sick during the holidays... I am so grateful that with a few days' bedrest I will be on my feet again. I had to forego all the baking I usually do the days before Christmas, and all the gifts I prepare for my neighbors who are also my friends. Today, one neighbor drove up and delivered a gift to me, like she does every year, but this year, I didn't have a gift for her because my energy level has been so low that I haven't tackled presents for neighbors. I'm lucky if I get presents for my husband and son done. WEll, son will get his... but husband, hmmm.... doubt it. Seems I always put him last on the list because he's the most difficult to buy for, and usually at the last minute I find something that is just right for him. This year, the last minute never came... unless it will happen tomorrow. If I'm feeling well enough, I may give it a shot. He needs an 18 volt drill (battery operated, rechargeable), something heavy duty. I emailed my son tonight to see if he could find one for me... it's my last hope! So, this year, I'm playing it by ear, and byheart. I'll be very grateful when I'm feeling 100% again. You mentioned depression... Oh, I know all about that... been there, and Amen to your words, sister. I know it is always out there, like a pit waiting for you to fall in unawares. I fell in one time, and like to not got out... couldn't get out on my own. Only the good Lord helped me with that one. But the pit of darkness is never far away for many of us. Merry Christmas to you, my friend. Bea
Merry Christmas, may your day be blessed.
Sugar
I hope that you have a wonderful time tommorrow baking your pies and wrapping your gifts and an ever better time at your sister's on Monday. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas all around. Have to say I absolutely loved the elf! I did it with the little girl we had staying with us last night and we sent one to her parents for their enjoyment! Merry Christmas!
love,
Marie
http://journals.aol.co.uk/mariealicejoan/MariesMuses/
I hope you had a blessed Christmas, Sheria. What a great entry - you write with compassion and understanding which can only be written by one who has experienced and conquered! It is so much better to live in the present and simply remember the past, learning from it's experiences. Have a blessed week. Love Caroline
http://journals.aol.com/caromarls/ANewAdventure
this is a wonderful entry. you write so well. i hope you had a wonderful day!
gina
I don't think therapist feel superior necessarily. They do also want to help people to live more fulfilling life and be there especially for the lonely and those who feel rejected and misunderstood. But I hear what you say and indeed you do seem humble and full of love for others.
Merry Christmas to you and loved ones.
Valerie
http://journals.aol.co.uk/iiimagicxx/surreality/
Hi Valerie:
I have a great deal of respect for therapists. It was a good therapist that helped me recover my balance and reclaim my life. My comment wasn't about therapists; it was about me. I fear that when I write about my struggles with clinical depression that I may inadvertently sound as if I'm trying to tell others what path they should follow. I don't have any answers and I don't want to suggest that I know some secret. I think that is unfair to all of the people who are struggling with this illness. It is a difficult path to travel without having someone suggest that if you would just seek and find the magic bullet, you'll be okay. I don't want anyone to view my comments about my personal journey as professional advice on overcoming depression.
Thanks for stopping by,
Sheria
Very nice entry, Aimer. I'm glad you are happy and hope you had a great time over the Christmas Holiday. I also want to thank you for those links to other journals. I just visited Raven's and got lost for a while since there was so much to explore. I wish I had more time to explore them all. I intent to visit others when I can. Your advise is ALWAYS well taken. There is so much talent on this site and so many friends to share with. Keep faith and thanks for being so supportive. Did you save me a piece of that Sweet Potato Pie?
Your Friend,
RIVER
Wise thoughts expressed here and humble. I am glad you are having a peacful and joyous Christmas. I have been very joyous today despite any problems. I am still in reasonably good health, got to see all my family who were all having a good Christmas. Gerry
Hey there!! I hope you had a wonderful christmas and I hope santa bought you lots of prezzies. :) Have a happy and healthy new year girl!
Dina
"Darkness has a hunger that's insatiable; lightness has a call that's hard to hear." - Indigo Girls. I'm glad you're living in the light, not the dark now:) And, if you have a good sweet potato pie recipe, I'd LOVE to have it! Yum! Happy new year as I'm a tad late for Christmas greetings. -- Robin
Sorry I have not been over here in a while but I hope your Christmas was wonderful and have the Happiest of NEW YEARS as well. I just love your entries you write so well. You were an English teacher so I guess that is why but have you ever thought of writing a book ( about anything)? I can't say I have suffered from depression but I sure have had to pull my mind and spirit out of many a dark place over the years. At times, it can just jump on me and I have to remember to give God the Glory for my life and everday to brighten me up. That and time usually gets me on the road to a happier place. God Bless. p.s. I LOVE SEET POTATO PIE! : )
You have the formula for peace.
" I live in the present; I remember the past; I look forward to the surprises of the future. "
wisdom bigtime...working towards that one...~raven
Whata beautiful entry Sheria! the Temptations as so good!
hey do you listen to Smokey and what do you reccomend to my son..he wants to find Mo town numbers, has some but wats to add on!
gorgeous graphics girl friend!
A lovely holday entry..I beleive I read it before but it reads so well!
love,natalie
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